Saturday, September 29, 2012

The Beginning

I really don't know where to begin in order to get the jumble of my thoughts out of my head and down onto this piece of paper, so I guess I'll just start writing and see where I end up.  This is a very big step for me to be taking as I am an extremely private person, especially when it comes to my thoughts and feelings about being gay.  Only a few people that are quite close to me know about me being gay, which is why I am keeping this blog anonymous for the time being.  Plus I am well aware of how much more open I can be if I do not reveal my identity to the world at this time.  I have felt that I should start this blog and lay my thoughts and feelings out for many to see because I am hoping that some may finding some help in my journey as I figure my life out myself.  I also think that this will help me to organize my thoughts, so it is a win-win situation as far as I can tell.

I have no idea how many people if anyone will actually read this, but I had to start somewhere and see where I am led.  There has to be a beginning to everything and thus this is the beginning of my blog, my writing to the world so that they can know there is someone like them.  Everyone has a unique situation and I believe there are others in similar situations as mine who are already writing blogs, but maybe someone needs my specific words in order to get the help they need.

A little bit of information about me as we commence our journey into my mind (I won't get too detailed).  I am currently a student at Brigham Young University as I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  However, I am also very much a homosexual man, being very attracted to other men around me, so my life is quite a tricky situation as I am trying to reconcile the two things without lying to myself or without lying to the Church.  Granted, I am not a perfect person and have made mistakes in both regards, but I'm working on it and I believe there is a solution for me.  What that solution is, I have no idea, but I believe that my writing this blog will help me to figure it out for myself.  I am a returned missionary, having served an honorable full-time mission for the Church, and no matter what, I'm grateful for that experience and all that it taught me and what it helped me to become.

With that intro, I will close my beginning blog post and write more tomorrow as I will probably fall asleep if I continue to try writing and end up with a bunch of zzzzzzzzzzzz on the screen lol.  The first post is not very exciting as I haven't begun to talk about my experiences or feelings, but rather the thoughts behind this blog and a little bit about me so you might see a little bit of my motivation especially as I continue. Until we meet again, goodbye!


  1. Hmmm. A new "GMB". Welcome friend.

  2. Welcome! We call ourselves 'MoHos' (Mormon Homosexual) in these parts, and your journey is starting out like many others before you. It is indeed cathartic to put your feelings down on paper (even if its digital paper). So don't be shy - put your story out there for the world to see. :)